Skip to main content

Space (and Body) Invaders

 

With Alien: Romulus, Fede Alvarez becomes the latest director to try and recreate the magic of Alien and/or Aliens. Unsurprisingly he doesn't get close to those two masterpieces but he does serve an atmospheric slice of sci fi horror that may well scratch an itch for those unimpressed with the heavy handed musings of Prometheus and Alien: Covenant.

Set in the time period between Alien and Aliens, the story of Romulus is a back to basics haunted house but in space tale about a group of young miners attempting to escape corporate servitude by breaking into a derelict space station and liberating enough fuel to keep them in stasis while they reach another developed planet. Turns out the station is more decimated then decommissioned and they soon find themselves on the bottom of the local food chain.

The break in may be a group effort but it's clear from the off that the main focus of the story is Cailee Spaeny's Rain and her "brother" Andy, a salvaged synthetic human played by David Jonsson. Spaeny is an excellent lead, likeable and believable as a modern Ripley who grows in stature to deal with her increasingly grim situation. Jonsson might be even better,  following up last years Rye Lane with another star making turn as he plays two different versions of Andy across the runtime. You are pretty much on board with the whole team from the get go (except the one obligatory douchebag) as their circumstances are so dire it feels like this is there only realistic shot at having a life.

 Romulus is a slow burn, taking plenty of time to get to the alien action. Building tension is admirable but without the mystery that carried the early parts of the original the set up feels a little laboured. That said, when things kick off, they kick off. Alvarez uses all the skills he learned making The Evil Dead and Don't Breathe to set up insanely tense moments and there are some gnarly kills. For the most part there is a real focus on practical effects and this may be the best a Xenomorph has ever looked. The design really invokes the sexual violation iconography of the original, if something isn't trying to get inside people it's opening up a like a mutant vagina. The impregnation theme culminates in a final showdown that is simultaneously terrifying and goofy and is likely to prove divisive amongst series fans.

The film works best when it is being a stripped down genre movie so the constant desire to scream "this is an Alien film" is actually it's biggest flaw. Call backs to the Nostromo and Colonial Marine pulse rifles are all well and good but when the plot starts to be influenced by the prequels it's a little less welcome. There is also an attempt to drop a classic line that will make most people cringe in their seat. 

Where Ridley Scott's last two efforts in this universe were packed with ambition but muddled in execution, Romulus is all execution and very little ambition. It's essentially a remix of what's gone before coated in slick new paint and delivered by someone who knows their way around a horror film. That's good enough for an entertaining two hours.

7 decisions that are best for the company out of 10.

Note: Ian Holm plays a fairly major part in this movie. How can he do that if he died four years ago? By using AI to recreate his face and voice a la Peter Cushing in Rogue One a few years ago. I personally detest this and was tempted to score the film a 1 out of 10 as a result. In the end, it seems his family are happy about it and I'm not sure how egregious everyone else finds it so I decided not to factor it into the review.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Bad to the Bone Temple

28 Years Later : The Bone Temple is a direct sequel to, you guessed it, 28 Years Later. So direct in fact, that they were actually filmed back to back. Nia DaCosta replaces Danny Boyle in the director's chair and accomplishes something pretty remarkable by largely keeping pace with the stellar last instalment while giving Bone Temple a flavour all of its own.  We open with Spike (Alfie Williams) being forced to fight for his life in an empty swimming pool at the command of "Sir Lord Jimmy Crystal" (Jack O'Connell). Despite the young teen being clearly out of his depth, and traumatised, Spike scores a lucky (and gruesome) win over his opponent, earning himself a spot as one of Sir Jimmy's "Fingers". This means the lucky lad now gets to roam the land sporting a tracksuit and blonde wig and torture people to death in the name of Satan, who Sir Jimmy claims is his father. Not the journey of self-discovery Spike was looking for when he left his village at th...

Stand-Up and Deliver

Is This Thing On ? is inspired by the story of English comedian John Bishop, who attended a comedy open mic night while going through a divorce and went on to become a successful comedian and regular fixture on British television. The focus here, however, is not on an emerging comedy career but on the way finding a creative outlet gives the central character an injection of life and a new perspective on, and possibly a chance to save, his broken marriage. The premise is well executed but there isn't enough insight to prop up the threadbare story. Based on a UK comedian they may be, but events here are transported to New York. The film opens with Alex Novak (Will Arnett) looking lost at his kid's assembly before we witness him and wife Tess (Laura Dern) calmly decide to call time on their marriage. Feeling lonely (and broke) Alex signs up for an open mic spot in order to avoid paying the entrance and ends up diving headlong into the world of stand-up comedy, which ends up servin...

Trouble in Paradise

Thanks to Evil Dead and Spider-Man, Sam Raimi will forever be associated with horror and superhero movies, but he has actually dipped his toe in many genres, from Westerns to sports movies. Send Help appears to be his twisted take on a rom-com. A good looking guy and an also good looking but awkward woman are stuck getting to know each other in a tropical paradise in a classic romance setup. In a slight break from tradition, proceedings are garnished with buckets of blood and puke and served with a side of black slapstick and maiming. Said couple is Rachel McAdams as super competent, but socially inept business strategist Linda, and Dylan O'Brien as Bradley, Linda's douchebag boss who passes her over for promotion as soon as he inherits daddy's company. When the private jet they are travelling in goes down they find themselves the only survivors as they await rescue from a remote island. Similarly to 2022's Triangle of Sadness, the power dynamics are completely shifted ...

Gimme Shelter

  The start of another year means it's time for the annual "Jason Statham is a retired killing machine trying to live a quiet life but being forced to start stacking obituaries" movie. The typically nondescript title of this year's offering is Shelter and Stath's former special forces badass is called Michael Mason. When the British government agency that he used to drop bodies for comes calling at his remote Scottish lighthouse he is forced to take action, something that is complicated by the presence of a young orphan girl named Jessie (Bodhi Rae Breathnach). While our protagonist and his reluctant charge tear across the countryside, Naomi Ackie (criminally underused here) and Bill Nighy (putting in just enough effort to get by) scheme against each other at Spy HQ.  Jason Statham movies can essentially be judged on three criteria; Does he get to do cool action? Are the bad guys formidable enough? Is the plot and dialogue entertainingly cheesy rather than just e...

Lungbuster

With Iron Lung, YouTuber Markiplier, real name Mark Fischbach, becomes the latest content creator to dip his toe into the world of feature film production. His effort is not as accomplished as the work of the Philippou Brothers (creators of Talk to Me and Bring Her Back) but it's a lot more striking and original than last year's Shelby Oaks (directed by YouTube film critic Chris Stuckmann).  The film is based on a relatively niche video game of the same name, which was made by solo developer David Szymanski (who helped with the film's screenplay) and is set inside a submarine exploring an ocean of blood. We follow exactly the same premise here as our protagonist, a convict named Simon, spends the entire runtime welded into a decrepit submersible on a distant moon trying to earn his freedom. What his superiors are specifically looking for is unclear but he is told the blood ocean holds resources vital to the survival of mankind, who has been pushed to the brink of extinctio...

It Sure Does

 Love Hurts is Ke Huy Quan's first ever lead role. After decades out the game and struggling to keep his insurance prior to his Oscar winning turn in "Everything Everywhere, All At Once", you can hardly blame him for taking the chance to front a movie. Unfortunately, in Jonathan Eusabio's directorial debut, he has landed in a misfire. Quan plays Marvin Gable, a cheery real estate agent living his best life as he crushes the sales game and keeps everyone in the office (except for his depressed assistant) happy with his home baking. Unbeknownst to his colleagues he used to be a gangland hitman for his mob boss brother "Knuckles" and when the mysterious Rose, who Marvin was supposed to have killed, remerges, big brother dispatches the goons to get some answers from him. Cue high jinks as Marvin battles henchmen kung fu style while trying to keep his current and past lives from colliding. It's a fun idea but nothing quite comes together in the execution. Th...

2025 Movies Ranked

 Another year in the rear view mirror means another ranking of every new release film I caught in the cinema this year. Despite 75 films making the list there are some fairly big omissions so if your favourite isn't on here, just imagine it up near the top. Also, we are talking UK releases.  75. The Stranger Chapter 2 This lame duck franchise props up the rankings for the second year in a row. A little more happens this time round but there is no jeopardy since we know the protagonist needs to make it to part 3. Also undermines its main premise (people might just decide to murder you for no reason) by giving the masked killers backstory. At least a section with a wild boar trying to gut somebody means the audience aren't the only ones nearly bored to death. 74. Hurry Up Tomorrow When a musician decides to write and star in their own movie the results are often pompus nonsense, so the problem with this effort from Abel "The Weeknd" Tesfaye isn't that its ridiculous...

Econ Air

  Single location thriller Flight Risk is the latest film to suffer from an "over eager" trailer. That is to say, the trailer covers pretty much everything that happens in the movie, more or less in the exact order it occurs. On the plus side, it isn't a film that was ever going to keep any secrets so it doesn't suffer as much as some others have. FBI agent Madelyn Harris (Michelle Dockery) takes a flight with informant Winston (Topher Grace) but a short way into their journey they discover the pilot, played by Mark Wahlberg, is actually a mob hitman there to end them both before Winston can squeal. There is a brief opening at an Alaskan cabin and the finale is on a runway, but for the most part it's just the three of them in the cabin of a small plane. Events unfold almost like a theatrical play as the three talk and argue with intermittent attempts at murder.  The main thing to know about Flight Risk is that it is ridiculous. The decisions the characters make a...

The Grey Advert

 This Russo's action flick has all the ingredients of a top tier spy thriller but will leave you feeling like you've just watched an extended trailer for other films they want to make in the world of the "Grey Man".  Ryan Gosling plays Sierra 6 (yes the Sierras are basically 00 agents with the twist they all used to  be criminals) and is ideal casting as the sort of ass kicking man of few words this type of film is built around. All the archetypes you would expect are also present and played well by a stellar cast. Chris Evans is unhinged antagonist, Billy Bob Thornton is retired mentor, Rege-Jean Page is crooked politicain and Ana De Armas is the good agent caught in the middle. The plot is just as cookie cutter, involving Gossling being hunted by the people he used to work, computer files nobody was meant to see and hostages needing rescued.  Of course, all these things are tropes for a reason and done well (like they are here) equal an enjoyable movie. And the Gre...

Uncomfortably (Ve)Numb

Despite his somehow enduring popularity, Venom is a conceptually rubbish character. He is born of a period in comics when publishers wanted to make their child friendly characters edgy and Spiderman media, be it comics, films, games or whatever else, tends to get worse whenever he shows up. "Kind of like the good guy but bad" is one of the most boring villain types to begin with and no writer has ever come up with anything interesting enough to make him deserve his top billing amongst the wall crawlers stacked rogues gallery. The previous two films managed to (somewhat) sidestep the blandness of the IP by hiring a great actor in Tom Hardy and letting him do Jim Carrey style physical comedy mixed with a heart felt love story between a man and his super powered alien parasite. Given it is the last in last in the trilogy, Venom : The Last Dance really wants to have epic stakes and emotional resonance, leaving little room for the things that made the first two movies watchable. ...