A Barbillion Bucks

Barbie, like The Lego Movie, is a product film based on a product so successful it doesn't need to sell said product and instead uses the guaranteed exposure to tell its own fairly unique story.

Barbies of various type live in "Barbie Land" where every day is pink and perfect (for the Barbies at least) . When generic Barbie begins having thoughts about death and experiencing flat feet she has journey to the real world, accompanied by tag along, wannabe boyfriend Ken.

Revealing much more of the story would be a bit of a spoiler given how well the marketing has kept the nitty gritty of precedings hidden but it's safe to say the ensuing story is possibly the most meta film ever made. It comments on Barbie's place in the world, some "interesting" missteps Matel has made with the doll, and the irony of the company having an all male board before you even get to the feminist and class culture stuff. Even the movie's casting is meta. Having Margot Robbie, the embodiment of blonde perfection , as Barbie adds an extra layer to the notion of unobtainable beauty and Ryan Gosling is genius casting as Ken, the "sigma male" persona certain corners of the Internet have bestowed upon him being completely flipped on its head. It obviously helps that they are both outstanding actors. The rest of the cast are also great, the denizens of Barbie Land perfectly playing out the ridiculousness of the situation without ever winking at camera and Will Ferrell in one of his best roles in years as the oddball Mattel CEO.

Director Greta Gerwig performs a miraculous juggling act, balancing some fairly weighty themes with real belly laughs and somehow managing to keep a consistent tone across the most surreal two hours ever to gross over a billion dollars. It does pack a surprising emotional punch in some parts as well. There is one sequence, when they first reach the real world and Ken becomes aware of all the opportunies and positive stereotypes that men see every day, that as the father of a teenage girl was a real gut punch and one of the most subtlety effective depictions of modern day sexism you will see. The only real missteps Barbie makes are when it attempts to be too sentimental, a couple of more schmaltzy scenes feel overdone and the movie makes it's points more than adequately without them.

Mainly though, the film is just very, very funny, a blast of refreshing pink air into the blockbuster scene and a fun time for everyone.

8 horse out of 10 mojo dojo casa houses.

Comments

Welcome to Earth

Early on in Disclosure Day a character is told not to, under any circumstances, release the world changing information he has on the internet. For the masses to accept the truth, the reveal must be a carefully orchestrated, communal event. That's because this alien conspiracy thriller is a film about how important it is to tell a story the right way. There aren't many people more qualified to make such a statement than Steven Spielberg. Josh O'Connor plays Daniel Kellner, a cybersecurity expert who has stolen evidence of alien visitation from his employers and is trying to get it into the hands of his colleague, Coleman Domingo's Hugo so they can blow the doors off years of cover ups. Meanwhile, TV meteorologist Margaret Fairchild (Emily Blunt) is finding she can speak multiple languages, including one that seems to be non-human, and finds herself compelled to find Daniel. Chasing after them is shady suit Noah Scanion (Colin Firth) and his security team. These event...

Rushed Girl

Supergirl is the second film in Warner Bros' relaunched DCU. After the previous iteration fizzled out like a damp firework James Gunn was brought in to oversee a new dawn that promised to focus on quality over quantity and compelling scripts over corporate deadlines. Unfortunately, two films and less than a year in and we already have a movie that has clearly been made to fit a schedule rather than because anyone had a great idea for the character. Milly Alcock plays the titular Kryptonian, or Kara to her friends (not that she has any). Still mourning the loss of her home and family, and disillusioned with life on Earth, she is celebrating her birthday alone on a planet with a red sun. The lack of yellow sunlight hampers her superpowers meaning she can get drunk, but it also means she unable to stop her beloved dog Krypto from being poisoned when bad guy Krem (Matthias Schoenaerts) turns up to steal her ship. With three days to get the antidote she embarks on a mission to hunt do...

He-Management

A second Masters of the Universe movie (after the 1987 Dolph Lundgren vehicle) has been on the docket for a long time, with directors from John Woo to Jon M. Chu attached and rights bouncing around various studios. The success of Barbie (another Mattel property) is likely the reason this iteration of the project has finally made it to screens. While a look at what constitutes modern masculinity means it does share a little in common with its pink dappled cousin, it mostly just contents itself with being the most sincerely dumb summer blockbuster you can imagine. Nicholas Galitzine plays Adam, the Prince of Eternia, sent to Earth as a child to escape the skull-faced villain Skeletor (Jared Leto) who has conquered our hero's homeland. Fast forward fifteen years, and Adam is now a friendly Human Resources worker freaking out potential dates by telling them he is the long lost prince to a land of magic and wonder. Finally finding the "Sword of Power" he dropped on hi...

Sick Burn

The Evil Dead is horror's most consistent brand, with six films spanning over forty years and not a dud in sight. With Evil Dead Burn, French director Sébastien Vanicek keeps the streak alive, even if he doesn't quite manage to nail the unique feel of earlier entries. Souheila Yacoub plays Alice, whose husband dies in a Deadite (person possessed by a demon) induced car crash. A very tense post funeral get together with her in-laws goes from grim to apocalyptic when the dead arrive looking for a dagger that is capable of sending them back to hell. This is a slight change-up to the usual Evil Dead formula. Normally some fool reads from the Book of the Dead and the Deadites show up to torment and kill people with gleeful abandon. What distinguishes the undead nasties from those in other films is the fun they take in the mayhem. They are neither mindless monsters nor serious soldiers of Satan. They are just here for the love of the game. This somewhat softens the gore and allows ...

Can't Surf On Our Turf

The Surfer is a 70's style, psychedelic, psychological thriller set entirely on a beach and adjoining car park. Nicholas Cage is the eponymous character who may or may not be losing (or already have lost) his mind. It is simultaneously playfully fun and ickily unpleasant. Cage (his character is not named) takes his teenage son surfing, his plan being to show off the fancy clifftop pad he is in the process of buying, which also happens to be the house he grew up in. He doesn't get the chance however, as a group of alpha male surf bros have taken over the beach and declared it for local use only. His son returns to school, but Cage stays in the car park, determined to finalise his house deal and find out what is going on with Julian McMahon and his cult like band of beach thugs. Suffering a series of mishaps, he ends up stranded in the car park, and the baking heat, for days and begins to resemble the local hobo more than the successful businessman he began as. Two thin...

It Sure Does

Love Hurts is Ke Huy Quan's first ever lead role. After decades out the game and struggling to keep his insurance prior to his Oscar winning turn in "Everything Everywhere, All At Once", you can hardly blame him for taking the chance to front a movie. Unfortunately, in Jonathan Eusabio's directorial debut, he has landed in a misfire. Quan plays Marvin Gable, a cheery real estate agent living his best life as he crushes the sales game and keeps everyone in the office (except for his depressed assistant) happy with his home baking. Unbeknownst to his colleagues he used to be a gangland hitman for his mob boss brother "Knuckles" and when the mysterious Rose, who Marvin was supposed to have killed, remerges, big brother dispatches the goons to get some answers from him. Cue high jinks as Marvin battles henchmen kung fu style while trying to keep his current and past lives from colliding. It's a fun idea but nothing quite comes together in the execution. Th...

The Bourne IT

The set up for The Amateur is a well worn one, a man loses his wife in a terrorist attack and goes on a mission of revenge. The twist is, that while Rami Malek does play a man with a particular set of skills, they aren't the ones you would expect. Charlie Heller is a socially awkward CIA cryptographer with precisely zero fighting ability and no experience using firearms. He is though, a technological genious who invented half the agencies cyber security and can track and predict patterns like a computer. When his blatantly shady boss, played with smug glee by Holt Mccallany, refuses to act on Charlie's info about the killers he blackmails him for some training and the green light to pursue the perpetrators himself. The two main questions are, can the mild mannered tech guy thrive in the field and is this twist on the formulae enough to carry a fairly by the numbers espionage thriller? The answer to both is, pretty much, yes. Malek is tailor made for roles like this and it'...

2025 Movies Ranked

Another year in the rear view mirror means another ranking of every new release film I caught in the cinema this year. Despite 75 films making the list there are some fairly big omissions so if your favourite isn't on here, just imagine it up near the top. Also, we are talking UK releases. 75. The Stranger Chapter 2 This lame duck franchise props up the rankings for the second year in a row. A little more happens this time round but there is no jeopardy since we know the protagonist needs to make it to part 3. Also undermines its main premise (people might just decide to murder you for no reason) by giving the masked killers backstory. At least a section with a wild boar trying to gut somebody means the audience aren't the only ones nearly bored to death. 74. Hurry Up Tomorrow When a musician decides to write and star in their own movie the results are often pompus nonsense, so the problem with this effort from Abel "The Weeknd" Tesfaye isn't that its ridiculous...

Tune In, Cop Out

Tuner lead character Nikki (Leo Woodall) hasn't had much luck. His parents aren't around and H yperacusis (an extreme sensitivity to noise) put an end to his piano playing days. Now he puts his enhanced sense to use as a piano tuner, working for mentor and father figure Harry (Dustin Hoffman). When Harry falls ill and into debt, Nikki takes on a sideline in safe cracking for shady security boss Uri (Lori Raz). All is well at first, but as time goes on it becomes increasingly hard for Nikki to juggle his day job, lucrative but dangerous side hustle and a blossoming romance with musical student Ruthie (Havana Rose Liu). The set up may make you think you are in for a slick crime caper, but that's not really what this film is. Director Daniel Roher made his name in documentaries and Tuner has a very naturalistic feel. The city is vibrant and busy while close up shots show the intricacy of the pianos and locks Nikki has mastery over. We are following characters (mainly Nikki)...

Really Kinky Boots

Pillion has been described by one of its stars, Alexander Skarsgård, as a dom-com. What he means by that is that this motorcycle romance ticks plenty of rom-com boxes while sporting a heavy coat of BDSM and graphic sex scenes. This description actually sells the film a little bit short. Harry Melling plays Colin, an openly gay but quiet and reserved young man who lives at home with his father and terminally ill mother, Peggy. After singing in a Christmas barbershop quartet, Harry is spotted by enigmatic and unfeasibly handsome biker Ray (Skarsgard), who identifies him as someone with subservient tendencies. After a Christmas Day hook-up in a high street alleyway, Ray gives Colin the cold shoulder for months before taking him back to his house. Upon arrival, Colin discovers where his place in the household is, somewhere lower than the dog and slightly above the mud off Ray's shoe. He is tasked with completing all the daily chores, as well as anything else his master deems needing d...

Dan Says its Alright

Search This Blog