Skip to main content

Marvel-Less

 


The Marvels marks the first time people who don't keep up with the deluge of Marvel TV shows will feel properly out of the loop. More worrying it feels more like one of the shows than a tent pole movie. 

The plot follows Captain Marvel/Carol Danvers, Miss Marvel/Kamala Kahn and Monica Rambo as they try to stop new leader of the Kree Empire, Dar-Benn from destroying various planets to fix her own. The McGuffin trinket that allows the villain to do this also leads to the three heroes switching location whenever they use their powers, forcing them to stay together and work as a team.

The dynamics of the group are fun with Ms Marvel actress Iman Vellani easily the best thing about the film. Hopefully she stays on the big screen going forward and isn't wasted in more Disney + mediocrity. Brie Larson does her best as Captain Marvel but the "I tried to help but it didn't work out" colonial guilt storyline doesn't really work on a character you are trying to portray as an out and out hero. Teyonah Parris' has the least to do as Monica Rambo and often feels as if she is just there to make up the numbers. 

The Marvel, like much of the MCU, works best in its light hearted moments. Sam Jackson once again decides Nick Fury is going to be a completely different character and is consistently funny. Anytime him or Kamala Kahn's non plussed family are on screen is a good time. There is also a fun section on a planet where the inhabitants only understand words when they are sung although it all gets a lot more generic once the fighting starts. 

That really is the story of The Marvels, any creativity is buried under a tonne of MCUness. Director Nia DaCosta has said its more a Kevin Feige movie than hers and it really shows. From the focus on TV characters to the limited story it feels like a movie made to fill a hole in the schedule. Antagonist Dar-Benn is a prime contender for most forgettable Marvel villain and let's be honest, there is some stiff competition for that role. Again actress Zawe Ashton does her best but a wannabe Khaleese who speaks like she has too many teeth and reuses a weapon an already pretty boring villain previously wielded isn't enough to create a compelling threat. It was always going to be hard to create a decent bad guy with three leads and a side plot vying for screen time in a 90 odd minute movie. I'm sure it's just a coincidence that it took a female ensemble outing for Marvel to suddenly remember you can edit a movie to under two hours. 

There is also an inherent problem with having these three characters team up. It works great from a character point of view but requires the audience to turn a blind eye to story consistency in order for the three to be considered somewhat equals. Captain Marvel flew across the galaxy in minutes and overpowered  Thanos but hereshe struggles in scraps with a couple of goons. She is also seems no more effective at fighting the main villain than the other two leads who really aren't in her weight class. It's mentioned at one point that she has the power to restart a sun so why is she struggling to dispatch this B-Tech Ronin the Accuser?

The brief running time and humorous moments mean The Marvels isn't an avoid at all costs proposition but it adds to the sense the MCU in general is becoming a bit of a  pointless time sink. Less Marvellous and more less Marvel please. 

5 planets that haven't had their atmosphere sucked out of them out of 10.



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Really Kinky Boots

Pillion has been described by one of its stars, Alexander Skarsgård, as a dom-com. What he means by that is that this motorcycle romance ticks plenty of rom-com boxes while sporting a heavy coat of BDSM and graphic sex scenes. This description actually sells the film a little bit short. Harry Melling plays Colin, an openly gay but quiet and reserved young man who lives at home with his father and terminally ill mother, Peggy. After singing in a Christmas barbershop quartet, Harry is spotted by enigmatic and unfeasibly handsome biker Ray (Skarsgard), who identifies him as someone with subservient tendencies. After a Christmas Day hook-up in a high street alleyway, Ray gives Colin the cold shoulder for months before taking him back to his house. Upon arrival, Colin discovers where his place in the household is, somewhere lower than the dog and slightly above the mud off Ray's shoe. He is tasked with completing all the daily chores, as well as anything else his master deems needing d...

Now You Three Me

Now You See Me: Now You Don't is the somewhat surprising third instalment in the Now You See Me franchise. Surprising in that it has been nine years since the last film and it had looked like the magicians had played their last trick. The film itself is about as unsurprising as it gets, playing out exactly as you expect a pseudo-legacy sequel to play out, hitting many of the familiar beats while introducing a new group of characters to carry the torch when the original cast bow out. The Now You See Me films revolve around stage magicians The Four Horsemen using their unique skills to pull off altruistic thefts that stick it to bad corporations and individuals and redistribute the wealth either to the people said evil entity has wronged, or simply to the fans in attendance. Said Four Horsemen are; illusionist J. Atlas (Jesse Eisenberg), mentalist Merritt McKinney (Woody Harrelson), sleight of hand specialist Jack Wilder (Dave Franco) and either Henley Reeves (Isla Fisher) or Lula M...

Econ Air

  Single location thriller Flight Risk is the latest film to suffer from an "over eager" trailer. That is to say, the trailer covers pretty much everything that happens in the movie, more or less in the exact order it occurs. On the plus side, it isn't a film that was ever going to keep any secrets so it doesn't suffer as much as some others have. FBI agent Madelyn Harris (Michelle Dockery) takes a flight with informant Winston (Topher Grace) but a short way into their journey they discover the pilot, played by Mark Wahlberg, is actually a mob hitman there to end them both before Winston can squeal. There is a brief opening at an Alaskan cabin and the finale is on a runway, but for the most part it's just the three of them in the cabin of a small plane. Events unfold almost like a theatrical play as the three talk and argue with intermittent attempts at murder.  The main thing to know about Flight Risk is that it is ridiculous. The decisions the characters make a...

It Sure Does

 Love Hurts is Ke Huy Quan's first ever lead role. After decades out the game and struggling to keep his insurance prior to his Oscar winning turn in "Everything Everywhere, All At Once", you can hardly blame him for taking the chance to front a movie. Unfortunately, in Jonathan Eusabio's directorial debut, he has landed in a misfire. Quan plays Marvin Gable, a cheery real estate agent living his best life as he crushes the sales game and keeps everyone in the office (except for his depressed assistant) happy with his home baking. Unbeknownst to his colleagues he used to be a gangland hitman for his mob boss brother "Knuckles" and when the mysterious Rose, who Marvin was supposed to have killed, remerges, big brother dispatches the goons to get some answers from him. Cue high jinks as Marvin battles henchmen kung fu style while trying to keep his current and past lives from colliding. It's a fun idea but nothing quite comes together in the execution. Th...

This Week at Home

Three films this week. First up is new Amazon Prime comedy Ricky Stanicky . A group of friends blame all their miss adventures on a fictional friend but when their partners become suspicious they hire a boozed up John Cena to play the part of the infamous "Ricky Stanicky". Its stupid and there's no denying the lying bro's deserve more comeuppance than they get but there are some good laughs and an unexpectedly uplifting ending.    Next up Jason Statham kicks all kind of ass as The Beekeeper , a retired uber-badass who rampages from call centres to Washington after his elderly neighbour is scammed to suicide. The Stath spouts some insane dialogue, sometimes in something approximated an American accent while a couple of feds on his tale layer on the bee metaphors. Hits all the punching, kicking, shooting and gruffness you want in a Statham movie.  Last up is The House of the Devil , an early entry in the fascinating horror filmography of Ti West. An homage to the devil ...

I Hate You So Much Right Now

  Die My Love opens with a fixed camera observing a couple exploring their new house. This voyeuristic introduction sets up the isolated home as a character in its own right and gives the impression you are about to watch a horror film. In a way, you are. The couple are new mum Grace, played by Jennifer Lawrence, and her partner Jackson (Robert Pattinson), who inherited the house from his late uncle. Although they are playful with each other while checking out their new home, once they move in it becomes clear they have some major problems. Grace stalks through the grass on all fours, hiding from Jackson and a star gazing session foreshadows a fundamental difference in the way they feel about life and their situation. The cosmos makes her feel insignificant while he is thrilled at the thought of being part of something larger. As time goes on, Grace feels more and more isolated, while Jackson is either physically or emotionally absent, and her behaviour becomes increasingly erratic...

Predator Chadlands

After revitalising the Predator franchise with 2022's Prey, director Dan Trachtenberg brings us a very different take on the extraterrestrial big game hunter. In Predator: Badlands , the titular monster is the main character. Considering how terrible that premise could have been, we actually end up with a decent action adventure movie. Our protagonist is Dek, a Yautja (the species name of the Predators) who is considered something of a runt. Such a runt in fact, that his dad wants to kill him for being a pitiful disgrace to the clan. After his brother saves him, he makes his way to "the Death Planet" Genna to hunt a supposedly unkillable monster in order to show his father who is boss and force the rest of the clan to put some respect on his name. When he gets there he discovers that, not only is all the wildlife deadly, but Weyland-Yutani ( yes, the evil corporation from Alien) have sent a bunch of synths there to collect and weaponise his prospective trophy. He forms an...

Blood, Swearing and Call Backs

  Depending on who you ask, Deadpool and Wolverine is either a glorious, long-awaited team up of two pop culture icons dripping in the best kind of fan service and stuffed with funny gags and uproariously OTT fight sequences or it's a vapid husk of a movie, trading solely on things that have come before mixed with dick jokes that's looking to make a quick buck by pleasing people who care more about the colour of costumes than substance. It's fairly easy to make an argument either way.  There is no doubt the film is absolutely stuffed with references to, and appearances from, all things superhero. Well, Fox superhero anyway. Deadpool and Wolverine is much more love letter to the now defunct Fox iterations of X-men (and many others that would be a crime to spoil) movies than it is attempt to slot Deadpool into the MCU proper. The cameos, or rather appearances (director Shawn Levy says they are too integral to be called cameos) do seem to be there in the spirit of genuine fun...

Uncomfortably (Ve)Numb

Despite his somehow enduring popularity, Venom is a conceptually rubbish character. He is born of a period in comics when publishers wanted to make their child friendly characters edgy and Spiderman media, be it comics, films, games or whatever else, tends to get worse whenever he shows up. "Kind of like the good guy but bad" is one of the most boring villain types to begin with and no writer has ever come up with anything interesting enough to make him deserve his top billing amongst the wall crawlers stacked rogues gallery. The previous two films managed to (somewhat) sidestep the blandness of the IP by hiring a great actor in Tom Hardy and letting him do Jim Carrey style physical comedy mixed with a heart felt love story between a man and his super powered alien parasite. Given it is the last in last in the trilogy, Venom : The Last Dance really wants to have epic stakes and emotional resonance, leaving little room for the things that made the first two movies watchable. ...

Smile for the Cameras

  The October horror train continues with Smile 2 , follow up to 2022 breakout hit Smile. Director and writer Parker J. Finn returns with a much more textured character story that is let down by retreading the same beats and half frights as its predecessor. After a brief segment involving Joel from the first movie we focus on pop star Sky Riley (Naomi Scott) as she attempts to mount a comeback a year on from a drug induced car crash that claimed the life of her boyfriend and left her needing extensive surgery. Unable to get strong painkillers due to her addiction problems she visits an old drug dealer friend to procure some Vicodin but when he smashes his own face in with a plate weight she inherits "The Smile" curse. She begins to experience bizarre goings on and people creepily grinning at her as she enters a race against time to discover what's going on and find a way to rid herself of the demon.  By far the strongest element of Smile 2 is the character of Sky and the...