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2025 Movies Ranked


 Another year in the rear view mirror means another ranking of every new release film I caught in the cinema this year. Despite 75 films making the list there are some fairly big omissions so if your favourite isn't on here, just imagine it up near the top. Also, we are talking UK releases. 



75. The Stranger Chapter 2

This lame duck franchise props up the rankings for the second year in a row. A little more happens this time round but there is no jeopardy since we know the protagonist needs to make it to part 3. Also undermines its main premise (people might just decide to murder you for no reason) by giving the masked killers backstory. At least a section with a wild boar trying to gut somebody means the audience aren't the only ones nearly bored to death.



74. Hurry Up Tomorrow

When a musician decides to write and star in their own movie the results are often pompus nonsense, so the problem with this effort from Abel "The Weeknd" Tesfaye isn't that its ridiculously self-aggrandizing (although it very much is), its that its unrelentingly dull, hideous to look at and worse to listen to. The star should have just made a concert movie.



73. I Know What You Did Last Summer

The 1997 original had a killer premise and a rogues gallery of hot, late-nineties Hollywood up and comers, and it was still pretty weak sauce. This dull legacy sequel musters up a decent cast of its own but gives them nothing to do other than spout some of the most insipid dialogue of the year and die bloodless and unimaginative deaths. Shoe-horning in original cast members doesn't add much. 



72. Wolfman

After bringing The Invisible Man into the twenty first century to resounding success a couple of years ago, writer/director Leigh Whannell tries the same with the Wolf Man but misses the mark big time.  Attempts to be a metaphor for family breakdown via "The Fly" style body degradation but both elements are woefully undercooked, leading to a bland and boring viewing experience.



71. Love Hurts

After decades in the wilderness, Ke Huy Quan finally gets the chance to be a leading man. What a shame that this weak action comedy does him a disservice. Quan is good value as the mild mannered realtor with an ass kicking past and some of the slap stick fighting is enjoyable enough, but it never really mines the fun of the dual life set up and there is a distractingly unbelievable romance icking things up.



70. A Working Man

Jason Statham is the perfect Hollywood action man, able to look cool shooting guns, punching people's lights out or driving fast cars. Sadly, the meandering script and piss poor production values on display here give him no chance to shine and leave us staring at the things he can't really do. Like anything approaching an American accent. Hard to believe this is the same director/star combo that gave us last years "The Beekeeper" 



69. Death of a Unicorn
 

Horror comedy about a vengeful mummy 'Corn taking out a pharmaceutical company owning family of rich dick heads after they discover ground unicorn horn can cure all manner of ailments. Entertaining performances from Richard E. Grant and Will Poulter, but the script is ponderous and Paul Rudd's bootlicking, daughter disregarding lawyer is one of the most unlikable "sympathetic" characters of all time.



68. Dangerous Animals

Jai Courtney gives a gloriously gonzo performance as a mad boat captain who feeds tourists to sharks and videotapes the grizzly results, but the movie takes a nosedive anytime he isn't on screen. The battle of wills between him and captive Hassie Harrison would be intriguing if it wasn't undermined by the rather patronising idea that she needs a love interest in order to find that extra bit of grit required to survive. 



67. Honey Don't

How can a film starring Margaret Qualley as a horny, lesbian, gum-shoe private eye investigating a Church cult run by sleazy criminal pastor Chris Evans be so boring? By having her do pretty much nothing for ninety minutes while the plot resolves itself through a series of coincidences. It's beginning to look like Ethan Coen really needs big brother Joel around to deliver the goods.



66. Until Dawn

Based on a game that apes horror movies, this is a film that uses game mechanics. Every time the cast die they respawn and live the night over again. An interesting premise and it gets off to a strong start but soon runs out of creativity and attempts to focus on the bonds of friendship fall flat as the cookie-cutter characters are too annoying to get behind. A late effort to tie events more directly to the game just muddies the waters.



65. Ella McKay

Dramedy about a politician that ties itself in knots trying not to be political. Set in 2008 to avoid modern politics, Ella represents "a party" and becomes governor of "a state". Her big political quest is, maybe kids should see a dentist or something. Has a couple of amusing moments but underuses its best assets, Woody Harrelson and Jamie Lee Curtis and an intrusive voice over from Marge Simpson is distracting. 



64. Five Nights at Freddy's 2

Less sleeping and more actual scares than the first film but still lacks any real narrative urgency or characters that act remotely human. The made for the movie elements don't really gel with the parts lifted directly from the cult video game source material, although we do get some fun animatronic on animatronic violence. Might be a fun easter egg hunt if you are familiar with the game's crazy lore.



63. Captain America: Brave New World

Less brave new and more same old as Marvel serve up another bare bones, made in the edit effort. It isn't all bad, Anthony Mackie steps into the lead role with aplomb and Harrison Ford is here, but it feels like a TV show and the marketing gave away the ending, meaning there is no tension for most of the runtime. That's before we get into the "misguided" decision to dust off and rebrand an obscure 80's Mossad agent superhero. 



62. Ballerina

Ana de Armas brings a different energy to the fights in this John Wick spin off but other than that it's business as usual, meaning nonsense world building and pseudo philosophy bridging the gaps between increasing floaty action scenes. For Wick fans it's surely a welcome addition, but for someone who mentally checked out of the franchise somewhere during chapter 3 it's mostly action white noise.



61. The Women in the Yard

Okapi Okpokwasili is imposing and scary as the mysterious figure who appears in the garden of a recently bereaved family, but the idea of ghosts as a metaphor for depression and suicidal thoughts has been done many times before and much better than this. The presence of a young child makes watching more stressful than scary and it's hard to get behind the struggling mother since we never see her at her best.



60. Shelby Oaks

Debut effort from Youtube critic turned filmmaker Chris Stuckmann looks surprisingly polished for a film funded via kickstarter but ends up becoming more of an homage to other horror movies than a successful film its own right. There are decent moments when the lead character isn't making bizarre choices and the camera stays still long enough for the audience to take anything in. 



59. The Conjuring : Last Rites

Bloated fourth film in the series feels as much family drama film as horror movie as it attempts  to set up new protagonists for future entries. Nothing new in the scares but doing the basics well would be good enough if the film didn't constantly slap you around the face with the insulting notion that real life con merchants Ed and Lorraine Warren were actually saintly warriors of God. 



58. M3GAN 2.0

Sequel to the 2022 break out hit ditches any horror connections and goes full Terminator 2, with the killer doll being resurrected as protector against a new robot threat, but it never really delivers on the bonkers premise. The comedy elements work well but the film can't stick to its strengths and has moments of taking itself a bit too seriously. Gets bogged down in needless chatter and plot explanation. 



57. The Housemaid

Adaptation of the viral hit book struggles in the translation to screen. The dialogue is stilted and there isn't enough plot to fill the two hour runtime, with everything revolving around a single twist. And yet, the film has a charm of its own as an edgy, upscale version of a TV "movie of the week". Strong central performances from Sydney Sweeney and Amanda Seyfried, even if they often feel like they are in different films.



56. Chainsaw Man-The Movie : Reze Arc

As the mouthful of a title suggests, this Japanese animation is merely a slice of a much larger, on-going story. Without someone to fill you in at least a little on what is going on it is pretty incomprehensible to none fans, and even without that hurdle the pacing isn't the best, with all the talking first, then all the fighting at the end. Still, the animation is super slick and the world it is set in is intriguing.  



55. Now You See Me 3

Just about passable entry in the magicians-do-heists franchise. Some of the banter between the original 4 horseman and the new editions are fun, some are cringeworthy. Some of the tricks are cool, some are too CG heavy. Some of the cast get to shine, some are sidelined. Rosamund Pike is a fun and hateable villain as a South African diamond minor complete with ridiculous accent.



54. Opus 

Stylish but slight cult of personality physiological thriller that lives in the shadow of similar, better offerings. John Malkovich is given the chance to go full John Malkovich as a reclusive pop star come cult leader, to unsurprisingly entertaining results, but the movie doesn't fully develop any of its ideas and the pace is uneven.  Entertaining but easily forgotten with an ending that tries to have its cake and eat it. 



53. Flight Risk

Mel Gibson may be a never ending fountain of idiocy in real life but he remains a savant behind the camera. His ability to always choose the right shot gives life to this otherwise very by the numbers one location thriller about a police officer and the witness she is escorting trapped on a plane with a hitman for a pilot. Passable old school fair that will mostly be remembered for Mark Wahlberg's hilarious baldy combover look. 



52. Good Boy

Horror suspense told from the point of view of a loyal dog trying to protect his ailing owner from sinister forces works better than you would expect, and painstaking work must have gone into getting so much from the canine leading man. Not particularly scary and even at 73 minutes the film is stretching its plot. Almost certain to lead to rush on Nova Scotia Duck Tolling Retriever sales. 



51. Anaconda

Comedy farce about some old high school friends who travel to the Amazon to make a shoestring budget remake of 90's B-movie Anaconda feels like an excuse for buddies Jack Black and Paul Rudd to hang out somewhere and get paid for it. Not particularly funny and light on big snake action but the cast have enough charisma to make it mostly enjoyable and props for location filming, even it was in Australia rather than South America.



50. Springsteen: Deliver Me From Nowhere

Rejects conventional biopic tropes in favour of a deep dive on a particular period in "The Boss"'s life as he wrestles with the shift to superstardom. An interesting approach but the film falls between two stools. There isn't enough playing of the hits to satisfy Springsteen fans and, while tackling themes of creation, depression and moving on is commendable, it never goes beyond the surface level. 



49. The Toxic Avenger

Re-make of the 80's schlock superhero comedy is better than expected given it's been sitting on a shelf for years. Smooths off the nastier edges of the original to make itself somewhat palatable to a modern, mainstream audience and dials in on the satire with a garish, TV-commercial take on capitalism gone wild. Fun while the blood is splattering but quickly forgotten once the credits role.



48. Mission Impossible: The Final Reckoning

The final (allegedly) MI movie keeps up the franchise record of never delivering a bad movie. Just. As ever, Cruise delivers in the action beats but there isn't enough here to justify the near 3 hour runtime as we are subjected to a deluge of exposition and flashbacks. Could do with spending less time telling the viewer how epic and high stakes it is and more time showing them. Has some fun returns from previous series characters.



47. Predator: Badlands

The Predator goes from killer antagonist to lead protagonist as a young "Yautja" tries to prove himself by hunting a supposedly unkillable monster. Does a surprisingly good job getting you on the side of a being who's MO is hunting less advanced species, and is a fun romp until it gets bogged down in a crossover with synths from the Alien franchise acting nothing like they do on their home turf. 



46. The Running Man

More faithful adaptation of the Stephen King source book and has some pacing issues as a result and the ending is flat. Still works though, thanks to a good central performance from Glenn Powell and some well choreographed action beats. Has quality actors in fun supporting roles but lacks the personality that the Arnie version had in spades and could have done with director Edgar Wright infusing it with some of his signature style.



45. Roofman

Channing Tatum stars in this real life story of an escaped convict Jeffery Manchester who hides in a Toys'R'Us for months. Interesting "you couldn't make it up" premise with strong performances and a sense of growing melancholy mixed with humour but a layer of Hollywood gloss makes events hard to swallow and there isn't much in the way of narrative propulsion. 



44. Novocaine

A mild mannered bank worker goes after some robbers when they take his new girlfriend hostage. He can't fight, but he has CIPA so he can't feel pain either, allowing him to mangle his body and create some interesting offence. Has a good energy and the violence is gnarly but most of the ideas were shown in the trailer and the story is driven by character decisions that make no sense, even by dumb action movie standards.



43. The Amateur

A twist on the "wronged man gets vengeance" flick in that Rami Malek is no action hero but a CIA tech nerd who takes out his wife's killers with schemes and booby traps. Doesn't really hit any beats a regular gun em down revenge thriller doesn't but Malek's nervous energy and different style of confrontation make it feel fresh enough. On the downside, it does its female characters dirty



42. Jurassic World Rebirth

They keep printing money so we keep getting them, this time with an all new A-list cast led by Scarlett Johansson and Jonathon Bailey. Fortunately, a big step up from the pitiful Dominion, even if it does continue the trend of increasingly stupid genetically altered dinosaurs. The steady hand of director Gareth Edwards and some inventive set pieces mostly compensate for an incredibly thin script. 



41. Babygirl

With a high flying job and loving family, Nicole Kidman seemingly has it all, but embarks on a risky affair with a young intern since her husband isn't into getting freaky in the bedroom. A very modern look at female sexuality, your opinion of which will depend on your ability to sympathise with a (in fairness, self made) one percenter who is prepared to risk burning her life down rather than just open up to her husband.



40.  September 05

Follows the kidnapping of the Israeli Olympic team from Munich during the 1972 games from the point of view of the sports reporters who ended up covering events live. It's a tense and well made insight into the day that changed journalism forever and although keeping the events at arms length dulls the intensity it leaves plenty of food for thought. Its refusal to provide context is frustrating, particularly given current events. 



39. The Fantastic Four : First Steps

Introducing the first family of superheroes in a universe separate from the main MCU does away with a lot of baggage and gives us a cool retro-futuristic world to enjoy. It's also a change of pace to have heroes that take their responsibilities a bit more seriously and dispense with glib one-liners. Mostly. Pretty pedestrian story though, and studio obsession with everything needing personal stakes muddies the waters of the FF being world protectors. 



38. Presence

Takes place entirely inside a house, from the point of view of a spirit with an intense interest in a troubled family. With its high concept and twist ending that doesn't make sense if you think too hard, it feels like a student film, but it's a Steven Soderbergh movie so is shot to the highest possible standard. Not a horror movie by any stretch but has an intense atmosphere of impending doom and a haunting final shot.



37. Bring Her Back

Gnarly psychological horror about an orphaned teen and his blind little sister who go to stay with a weird foster mum and her even weirder son. Tense and disturbing but sometimes hard to watch in a frustrating way, as you are forced to watch a well meaning big brother be gaslight and ignored while things escalate. Contains a kitchen scene that is not for the faint-hearted. 



36. Him

American Football prodigy undergoes intense training at his idol's desert compound, where things get increasingly strange. In your face directing style gives the film a unique feel, although it may be a bit much for some, and it maintains a good sense of mystery for most of the runtime. A lack of steady build-up means the ending kind of comes out of nowhere, although it is pretty satisfying. 



35. Warfare

Alex Garland teams up with former Navy SEAL Ray Mendoza to visualise a blow by blow account of a time Mendoza and his unit came under enemy fire in Iraq. Events take place in real time with minimal cinematic flair, creating a nerve-shreddingly tense and real feeling depiction of modern war. It is, by design, presented without context and completely partizan, so will frustrate many people, but it is incredibly effective in what it portrays. 



34. Thunderbolts*

The first theatrical MCU release since Marvel declared they were going to start putting a bit more planning and effort into these things and the new approach instantly pays off. Comes with some pretty sizeable plot holes but using less famous characters allows them to fit the script rather than the other way around and in a franchise so often defined by glibness and irony, its nice to see the day being saved by people being, well, nice. 



33. Companion

Sci-fi tinged exploration of one-sided, controlling relationships with Jack Quad playing (shocker) a loser who, as borderline farcical events ramp up, takes increasing advantage of his (for reason spoiled in the marketing) insanely devoted girlfriend, Sophie Thatcher. Not an especially deep observation but entertaining and nails a type of humour that so often goes toe-curlingly wrong 




32. The Cut


Nightmarish look at the most brutal part of boxing that you don't see, cutting the weight before a fight. Orlando bloom gives a fully committed performance as a washed up former title contender given another shot, provided he can lose an unfeasible amount of weight in a week. The film is as basic as the premise suggests but you are right there as his body breaks down and the hallucinations set in.





31. Superman

The closest a live action Superman has come to an issue of the comic, with viewers being thrust into a brightly coloured, hi-tech world packed with other superheroes and larger than life characters. Once you get on board with how busy it is, there's a fun time to be had with likeable characters and big scale action. The best of the year's superhero offerings and a promising start for the new look DC film universe. 



30. The Naked Gun

A 2025 reboot of The Naked Gun, without Leslie Nielsen, was ripe for disaster. Fortunately, the film is laugh out loud funny with Liam Neeson effortlessly dropping deadpan one liners and the ludicrous script doing a good job of capturing the spirit of the original, even if we never quite get the same highs as the series peak. Even when a joke misses it scarcely matters as another one comes along in about ten seconds. 



29. The Last Showgirl

Pamela Anderson turns in a great performance in this poignant but limited drama about a closing Las Vegas show. Catches the melancholic atmosphere of an end of an era and the sadness and resentment that comes with being left behind. Great character work on show and a distinct visual style shows a far less glossy side of Las Vegas than we are used to seeing. Slightly held back by the fact it only has one gear from start to finish.



28. Caught Stealing

Anarchic crime caper sees Austin Butler get in further and further over his head as his former baseball prodigy finds himself in the crosshairs of Russian gangsters, Yiddish hitmen and corrupt cops. Given the film works best when it is in madcap mode, director Darren Aronofsky's signature bleakness does clash with the story occasionally. One scene in particular threatens to derail the whole endeavour. 



27. Good Fortune

For all his action chops, Keanu Reeves best persona remains that of the mystical doofus, and a naive angel forced to live in the gig economy after switching a struggling worker's life with that of his clueless rich boss is perfect fodder for him. Pretty funny and doesn't cop out with the standard "being poor is fine" happy ending, although the capitalism lampooning could have done with a bit more anger behind it.



26. Materialists

Has your standard romance set-up with Dakota Johnson's love cynic matchmaker torn between hunky and rich Pedro Pascal and extra-hunky but poor Chris Evans. The film has much more on its mind though, being an examination of love as a commodity and a bleak look at the futility (and often danger) of the modern dating game. Could probably have used at least a little humour but the ending is well earned even if predictable.



25. Final Destination: Bloodlines

Barnstorming return for a franchise that, with its flexible gimmick, probably never needed to go away.  This time, death/fate is after a whole family who have been dodging their destinies for decades and there is a good mix of humour and entertaining kills. Attempts to tie into previous films are pretty pointless but the opening set piece is a series highlight and there is a surprisingly poignant final screen appearance from the legendary Tony Todd.



24. The Accountant 2

Belated sequel to the 2016 film about Ben Affleck's titular, neurodivergent genius who both cooks the books for criminals, and kills the really bad ones. Focuses more on the social aspect of the main characters condition this time round leading to a film that is surprisingly lite on action and more of a hang out movie. Fortunately, Affleck and Jon Bernthal are so good together you don't need them doing anything other than having a blast navigating their unique brotherly bond. 



23. The Alto Knights

Is this the best mafia film featuring Robert De Nero or written by Nicholas Pileggi? Of course not but its still got style and period atmosphere in abundance and Bob is locked in, in a way he isn't often these days, as he pulls double duty playing both Frank Costello and Vito Genovese. The plot is languid but a film like this lives on performances and sharp dialogue, both of which excel.



22. Wicked: For Good

Less sequel to last year's smash adaptation than a continuation. Covers the weaker half of the stage musical, doesn't have a "defying gravity" level musical banger to end on and has to fold in the events of the original "Wizard of Oz", so its...actually still pretty good, thanks to bold design choices and an even bolder lead performance from Cynthia Erivo. If you ever have a spare five hours, watching them together is probably the way to go. 



21. Avatar: Fire and Ash

The least inventive of the Avatar films to date as new threads give way to familiar tropes, with the climatic battle being almost a complete re-run of the Way of Water finale. Still, the plot barely matters as the idea is to completely submerge the viewer in an alien world and Cameron's direction combines with visual technology that leaves other productions in the dust to be as transportive as ever. 



20. Heart Eyes

Looked like it was going to be a slasher film with Valentine's Day branding, and it is, but it is also something more clever and entertaining. Hits all the beats of a standard rom com with the slight hiccup that a masked killer is trying to off the rivals come lovers as they have their moments. Funny and breezy without skimping on the crimson when it comes time for heads to roll, it's a fresh take on two genres.



19. The Long Walk

In a (totally implausible) near future dystopia, the American economy has collapsed and the country is in the grip of a propaganda spewing, authoritarian government. Great young cast play young men forced to walk til they drop literally dead in an effort to win a wish and the lo-fi farmland setting nails the melancholic atmosphere. Certainly not a cheery watch but poignant and unfeasibly exciting for a film about people walking.

 


18. The Monkey

Stephen King short story about a wind up monkey that causes death every time it activates is reimagined as the blackest of black comedies by "'Longlegs" director Osgood Perkins. Theo James is great as the oddball twins who's lives are defined by the murderous simian and there are a couple of very entertaining cameos, but the real selling point is the blend of macabre laughs, OTT splatter and genuine meditation on grief and loss. 



17. A Real Pain

Two formerly close cousins reunite for a holocaust tour in memory of their recently deceased grandmother. Oscar winning turn from Kieran Culkin (although he is definitely more of lead than supporting role) as the outgoing but troubled Benji, who is both a real pain and in real pain. Successfully marries whimsy, laughs and emotion even if you can see the notes it's going to play before they are plucked.  



16. Weapons

An entire class of children getting up and disappearing into the night is a killer hook for a movie and the rest the of film doesn't disappoint. Begins as a slow burn thriller as we get to know people in a Stephen King-esque small town before escalating into a bizarre and bloody finale. A dose of humour keeps things from getting too bleak and the film is open to multiple interpretations.



15. Tornado

The 18th century Scottish Western/Samurai film you didn't know you needed, as a Japanese puppeteer and Tim Roth's band of outlaws vie for some stolen gold in a tale of family, honour and clashing cultures. Plot is minimal but barren landscapes combine with superb cinematography and score to create a hauntingly bleak atmosphere. A film with its own distinct tone and cinematic language.



14. Bugonia

Yorgos Lanthimos returns with a more focused, but still bonkers, offering as a couple of conspiracy nuts kidnap a pharmaceutical CEO, believing her to be an alien. Another great collaboration with Emma Stone and the claustrophobic, almost horror tone keeps the audience on edge. Stone's otherworldly performance sows enough doubt to keep the direction the film is heading in unclear.



13. F1

Director Joseph Kosinski gives Formula 1 dogfights the same treatment he gave aerial ones in  "Top Gun: Maverick". The story of a veteran racer returning to the worlds premier motorsport for one more crack is as staid and predictable as it gets but the combination of some of the most impressive racing scenes ever put to film and Brad Pitt's megawatt charisma turbo charge the movie. Sometimes the tastiest meal is just a perfectly crafted cheeseburger. 



12. 28 Years Later

Decades on from reimagining the zombie genre with "28 Days Later", Danny Boyle and Alex Garland return to world they made with something completely different. Less straight up horror, although there is plenty to unsettle, more melancholic coming of age tale with a focus on humanity and an examination of Britishness. Split the crowd but that's what happens when you make bold choices. 



11. The Surfer

Psychedelic, psychological thriller set entirely on a beach and adjoining car park with Nic Cage potentially losing his mind as he comes under threat from some beach thugs and the blistering Australian sunshine. Cage is a genre unto himself, seemingly creating fascinating films simply by existing and this atmospheric and unnerving flirt with insanity is one of his best. Features the most disgusting water fountain you'll ever see.



10. We Live in Time

A24 gives romance the elevated shine it has been giving to horror for some time now in this tale of boy meets girl, boy and girl have a kid, girl gets cancer. What could have been a standard heart string tugger is elevated by fantastic central performances from Florence Pugh and Andrew Garfield and a told out of sync narrative device that mimics the way we remember lost loved ones. Aggressively middle class but it works for the story.



9. The Phoenician Scheme

A more character focused offering from Wes Anderson this time round, not that there isn't the usual galaxy of stars and astonishing set designs to admire. It's also ridiculously funny and indulges in some of the directors best world building, coming across like a modern Roald Dahl adventure. Some people find Anderson's films too similar but if anyone else could make films like this I'm sure they would.



8. Black Bag

Super slick spy caper with a ridiculously accomplished (and good looking) cast. Espionage is the name of the game as opaque loyalties and tense chats take centre stage in place of action. Whether you like all his films or not, Steven Soderbergh really knows how to make movies, and this an endlessly watchable, ninety minute, slice of a genre we hardly see any more and pretty much never see done this meticulously. 



7. Die My Love

Ferocious depiction of an isolated new mother potentially losing her mind in a rural Montana house. Addresses mental health in a non-judgemental and very cinematic way and features a, possibly career best, performance from Jennifer Lawrence that is animalistically intense and relatable at the same time. Not an easy watch and prepare to be infuriated by bozo husband Robert Pattinson and the world's most annoying dog.



6. The Roses

A very different, and much more British take, on "The War of the Roses" novel than the 1989 movie as we see a marriage breakdown over the course of years and outright hostility takes a back seat to sly putdowns and withering glances. A witty script and fantastic, complimentary performances from Olivia Coleman and Benedict Cumberbatch cement this anti-romcom as the most polished, and funniest, film of the year.



5. Mickey 17

Bong Joon Ho cashes in his Oscar chips for this gloriously stuffed, hi concept space satire. It's a commentary on class and colonialism, a first contact movie, an observation of humanity and individuality and an absurd space comedy. The grimy industrial feel of the ship is fantastic and Robert Pattinson has an absolute blast as two, very different, clones. Even has Red Dwarf references, what more could you want?



4. Pillion

A boyish Harry Melling has his eyes opened to the world of BDSM and gay biker gangs when he becomes a "sub" to Alexander Skarsgard's mysterious and impossibly handsome bike rider. Underneath the power dynamics and hilariously graphic sex scenes is a sweet story of self discovery that gives a frank and non-judgemental look at a niche subculture and reminds you coming of age stories don't have to be about kids.



3. One Battle After Another

Paul Thomas Anderson is hot favourite to finally land an Oscar for this sweeping tale of retired revolutionaries, white supremacists, underclass solidarity and family. Feels very current, but is really grappling with issues that define America in a more humorous and entertaining way than should be possible. Over two and a half hours long but filming of the highest level makes it  feel like ninety minutes. 



2. Nosferatu

A Nosferatu remake from Robert Eggers may be the most aimed at me film in the history of cinema and it doesn't disappoint. The attention to period detail would make Scorsese weep and every shot is a meticulous work of art. The language, and Bill Skarsgard's guttural performance as the vampiric Count Orlok, may make it a little hard to follow for those not familiar with the Dracula story, but the sense of doom and disgust are palpable throughout. Seems Eggers can only make masterpieces.



1. Sinners

Genre bending, prohibition era period piece that morphs into a southern-gothic horror. Director Ryan Coogler creates a unique blend of culture, music, homage, insight and just plain coolness that has to be seen to be believed. A stellar cast, including Micheal B Jordan seamlessly depicting gangster turned juke joint owning twins, and an incredible soundtrack that almost turns the film into a musical cement its position as the best film of 2025.








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The tagline for breakout indie horror hit Undertone is, "The Scariest Movie You'll Ever Hear". This declaration sets out the film's stall as a uniquely audio based horror, and that is exactly what it delivers. The result is something that will chill some people to the bone and leave others falling asleep in their seats.  Originally made for a meagre $500,000, the film takes place entirely in one location (director Ian Tuason's childhood home) and centres on podcaster Ivy, played with impressive range by Nina Kiri. Ivy is caring for her dying mother (the only other person who appears onscreen) so has to wait until the early hours of the morning to record her paranormal podcast with friend Justin (the voice of Adam DiMarco). She plays the role of sceptic to Justin's believer but her rationality is tested when her cohost begins playing some eerie audio files he received from an anonymous listener. Although Undertone isn't a found footage film, it very much t...

Hell to Pay

  They Will Kill You  begins with a soaking wet Zazie Beetz waiting to start her maid job at swanky apartment building, The Virgil. Her character Asia is a former convict who has no idea her new employers are devil worshipers who sacrifice their staff to Lucifer. The building residents have no idea that Asia is actually there for reasons other than a steady paycheque and is not about to go gently into that good night. The touch paper is soon lit on a relentless blend of slapstick horror action that leaves little room for you to catch your breath across its ninety minute odd runtime. The most obvious comparison here is to 2019's Ready or Not and its sequel (which coincidentally released one week before this film), where an unsuspecting bride is left fighting for her life when her wealthy in-laws opt to make her a human sacrifice. While They Will Kill You shares that movie's comedic spirit we are much deeper into supernatural territory here. The grand old building and seemingly ...

Fifty Shades of Chrononberg

 If you've been missing pure  David Chrononberg then Crimes of the Future has you covered. It has the lot; body mutilation, main character undergoing a metamorphosis, questions about what defines being human, integrity of the mind, the collision of different world views and pretty much every other recurring theme of his is present and correct. So needless to say, it isn't for everyone. The film takes place in the (possibly near) future, when most humans have evolved to no longer feel pain and in some cases grow mysterious new organs. Viggo Maortensen and Lea Seydoux play a pair of performance artists whose act revolves around removing Mortensen's excess organs in front of a live crowd. Fittingly, given its focus on artits, the film takes place in the orbit of the protagonists with little shown of the world at large. Everything is dingy and grimey, hinting things aren't going swimmingly, and there are vaugue hints at ecological disaster but the characters are all far mor...

Fight For Your Right

The debate about the "Great American Novel" (a book that encapsulates the spirit and character of the United States) continues to rage. While One Battle After Another is loosely inspired by a book (Thomas Pynchon's Vineland), it feels like Paul Thomas Anderson's second stab, after "There Will Be Blood", at crafting the Great American Movie. This is a very different beast to his 2007 masterpiece, both in setting and tone, but is just as epic and wide reaching in its own way. Perfidia Beverly Hills (Teyana Taylor) is the leader of militant revolutionary group "The French 75" and her partner Pat Calhoun (Leonardo DiCaprio) is the team explosive expert. The movie opens with the self-styled freedom fighters breaking a bunch of detained immigrants out of a holding camp. This brings them into the crosshairs of Colonel Stephen J. Lockjaw who begins pursuing the group. After being arrested, Perfidia disappears, leaving Pat to raise their baby daughter in hi...

2023 So Far

 Loose ranking of everything I saw in the cinema during the first 6 months of 2023. Let's just pretend it isn't a month late.  23. The Enforcer Antonio Banderas does little enforcing in this weak thriller. One dimensional characters, laughable dialogue and an aimless plot make this a waste of everyone's time. May The Enforcer not be with you. 22. John Wick Chapter 4 Features another great physical performance from Keanu Reeves but not even he can overcome the twin threats of bloated runtime and expanded universe nonsense. There's the odd fun set piece but people rolling around shooting guns doesn't need to last nearly 3 hours. 21. Transformers : Rise of the Beasts After the clean slate of 2018 's Bumblebee, Rise of the Beasts takes a u-turn back towards the motorway pile up of the Micheal Bay days. Not as much of a mess As "Rise of the Extinction Samurai Knight Moon" (I'm sure that was the name of one of them), since you can actually f...

Spooky Tresspaser

  The Women In The Yard marks the return of director Jaume Collet-Serra to his horror roots after years in the big budget action space. He puts some scary images together and gives a good cast a chance to shine but is let down by a fairly weak script. The film begins with struggling mum Ramona (Danielle Deadwyler) watching a video of her deceased husband. Struggling may be a bit of an understatement, the crash that took her husband also left her with a badly broken leg and she is stuck in a pit of despair so deep it has rendered her almost non-existent as a parent. Her son Taylor has essentially taken over looking after his little sister Annie, the food is running out and when the electricity goes off they have no means of contacting anyone. With tensions already frayed, things take a sinister turn as a mysterious and threatening figure in black appears in the garden, creeping slowly closer as the day drags on.  The titular woman in the yard is played with equal grace and mena...

Infinity Cruel

 Infinity Pool is first and foremost a critique of the kind of people who go to gated luxury resorts, the ones that have armed guards to keep away the impoverished locals. Therefore everyone here is disgusting. Uber handsome Alexander Skarsgard is a loser writer who spends most of the film sweating and dishevelled, Mia Goth goes from alluring to screeching alcaholic state, Thomas Kretchmann's local detective hates the entitled holiday makers but is happy to enable their explotation of his countrymen for financial gain. Pretty much everyone is morally bankrupt. This does create the slight problem of having nobody to get behind but that isn't really the point and this isn't the place you would find heroes. The plot revolves around an outrageous piece of (maybe) technology unique to the unamed country the film is set in. How a seemingly underdeveloped land came to posses such a thing is never really explored and neither are the ramifications of its existence beyond how they pe...

2023 at the Cinema

  Its the start of a new year which means it's time to put some movies in their place. This is not a definitive list of the best films of 2023, only things I saw in the cinema are eligible (sorry Killers of the Flower Moon) so if you're wondering why your favourite/most hated flick isn't on here it's because I didn't see it on the big screen. Also, I reserve the right to have a completely different opinion about any and all of the entries in a weeks time. 50. The Enforcer Tedious, no action "thriller" about a criminal debt collector and his trainee street tough. Not sure if this snoozefest began with aspirations of being a no nonsense Taken clone or a serious redemption story but a plot driven by coincidence, awful dialogue and a 99 cents aesthetic make it feel like something from the depths of Amazon Prime rather than a cinema release. No idea how they wrangled Antonio Banderas into appearing in such a damp squib. 49. Saw X  After attempting a detective m...