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Hugh You Gonna Call

 Heretic opens with two young Mormon missionaries talking about penises on a park bench. The light hearted opening is in stark contrast to the tension to come and serves as a fun introduction to two endearing characters. Sister Paxton (Chloe East) has been born and raised in the church, eager and enthusiastic she is desperate to land her first conversion. Sophie Thatcher's Sister Barnes is more experienced and more comfortable in the world at large. We spend some time getting to know them as they make their rounds, hearing about their hopes for a handsome husband and sadness at the way they shunned and considered "weird" by their peers. We are thoroughly on board with them by the time they encounter Hugh Grant's seemingly gregarious Mr Reed. He appears interested in their beliefs and impresses the girls with his religious knowledge but the conversation becomes more testy and they realise they can't leave Reed's house without playing his game. To say Hugh Gran
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Room for Who

  The Front Room marks the directorial debut of twin brothers Max and Sam Eggers. Their big bro Robert's debut, The Witch, back in 2015 marked him as one of the most exciting talents of his generation and his reputation has only grown since then. This film does no such thing for the twins but it is a fairly interesting  Psychological thriller. Singer/actress Brandy plays Belinda, a pregnant anthropology professor who quits her job after she gets sick of her condescending (and possibly racist) treatment at work. This puts her and husband Norman (Andrew Burnap) in a financial bind but they are given a potential lifeline in the form of Norman's astranged stepmother Solange (Kathryn Hunter). Elderly and frail, Solange needs somewhere to live following the death of Norman's father and offers the couple access to her considerable finances in exchange for them taking her in. Norman is against the idea as Solange is a religious nut who made his childhood hell and thinks she has di

Smile for the Cameras

  The October horror train continues with Smile 2 , follow up to 2022 breakout hit Smile. Director and writer Parker J. Finn returns with a much more textured character story that is let down by retreading the same beats and half frights as its predecessor. After a brief segment involving Joel from the first movie we focus on pop star Sky Riley (Naomi Scott) as she attempts to mount a comeback a year on from a drug induced car crash that claimed the life of her boyfriend and left her needing extensive surgery. Unable to get strong painkillers due to her addiction problems she visits an old drug dealer friend to procure some Vicodin but when he smashes his own face in with a plate weight she inherits "The Smile" curse. She begins to experience bizarre goings on and people creepily grinning at her as she enters a race against time to discover what's going on and find a way to rid herself of the demon.  By far the strongest element of Smile 2 is the character of Sky and the

Smears of a Clown

  The story of the success Terrifier 3 is enjoying is at least as interesting as the film itself. Over the course of three movies, writer director Damien Leone has grown the franchise from a $35,000 labour of love into the number one film at the North American box office. Whatever you might think of the films themselves, this a pretty impressive achievement and proof that even in this age of mega franchises and hundred million plus advertising budgets there's still room for a plucky underdog to find its audience with some gorilla marketing. As for the film itself, it's niche to say the least. An ultraviolet, gonzo gorefest about a killer clown called Art and the "chosen" girl who (provided she is in possession of her magic sword) is the only one that can put him down. If you don't find humour or amusement in people being dismembered in cartoonish but very gory ways, this film is not for you. If you are stressed out by on screen children in extreme peril, this fil

The Great Pagliacci

That Joker : Folie A Deux exists at all is a bit of an oddity given 2019 smash hit Joker was always meant to be a stand alone film. That it exists in this form; a song filled courtroom romance that can pretty much be classified as an anti sequel, is nothing short of extraordinary. I'm sure that when star Joaquin Phoenix decided he wanted another go around as troubled loner Arthur Fleck the money men at Warner Bros. were rubbing their hands but hats off to director Todd Phillips for getting reportedly close to $200 million out of them for this insane vision of a follow up. Picking up four years after the events of Joker, the Arthur we first see has been beaten down by his years of incarceration. He barely communicates and Brendan Gleeson's guard laments the fact he no longer amuses him and his colleagues with jokes. A glimmer of life returns when an encounter with fellow inmate Lee Quinzel (Lady Gaga) leads to a blossoming romance. Starved of affection for his entire life, Art

If You Go Down to the Woods Today

  At first glance, Never Let Go appears to be the story of Halle Berry (simply referred to as Mother) and her attempts to keep her two boys safe in a post apocalyptic world where evil stalks the woods outside their family home. It is really, however the story of the boys, their bond and the choices they must make. Said boys are twins Samuel and Nolan (played by Anthony B.Jenkins and Percy Daggs IV respectively). They live in a wooden house that they are told by Mother they can never leave unless tied to a rope that anchors them to their home, the only thing keeping them safe from a great evil that has ravaged the rest of the world. Should they fail to heed her advice, the evil will enter them and gain access to the homestead where it will kill them all. The only one allowed to roam free of a tether is their faithful dog Coda (the evil has no interest in animals) and if there is any suspicion one of the boys' faith is wavering it's into a compartment in the floor with them, wher

Vanity Unfair

  One thing The Substance is not, is subtle. It shouts it's themes loudly. It bathes the viewers eyeballs with beauty and then assaults them with grotesque body horror of the highest order. It infests the ears with horrible squelching, popping and cracking. It's quite an experience. Demi Moore plays Oscar winning actress Elizabeth Sparkle, who now hosts a daytime yoga show produced by odious TV exec Dennis Quad. Deemed over the hill on her fiftieth birthday (despite looking like Demi Moore) and let go she turns to a shady procedure that involves injecting herself with "The Substance".  This births the young and pristine Sue (Margaret Qualley) who picks up where Elizabeth thinks her life should be, becoming her own replacement on TV.  The problem is, the two halves need to share, with each being awake for seven days at a time and like feeding your Mogwai after midnight, there are extreme consequences to not respecting the balance. The Substance is a high saturation pa